I will, however, choose to let diabetes empower me. With the understanding that what I accept from this disease is on my terms and my terms only. I will allow T1D to make me stronger; to push me to be a more considerate and loving person; to be a better friend, daughter, and sister; and to make me a little more grateful for every day that I have.
It’s taken sixteen years for me to get to a point where I no longer am afraid of my disease. I had lived in fear of so much for so long – fear of the number on the screen, of not waking up in the morning, of telling my friends, of disobeying my parents. And I realize now that what I feared most was losing my sense of self. Finding the balance needed to discern the line between being a person with diabetes and being a person afraid of becoming diabetes was a very long process.
Awareness comes in all shapes and sizes and impacts everybody differently. Spreading awareness and knowledge is so very important, but staying personally aware and at peace is equally important. I’ve made my peace with type one diabetes through helping others understand this disease and all that it encompasses: sleepless nights, wonderful friendships, and the highs and lows in between. As bizarre as it may seem, talking about diabetes is one of my happy places; it keeps me grounded and gives me perspective.
Editor’s note: Lexicon is a The Diabetes Link Corporate Member and is dedicated to bringing awareness to the relationship between T1D and mental health. Watch our Mental Health and T1D Facebook Live event, which was made possible by funding from Lexicon.
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